Spring Chicken Humor





These are some of my favorite replies to the classic joke. Enjoy!

Why did the chicken cross the road?

RED RIDING HOOD: He was taking a shortcut to Grandma's house. I hope he is careful!

DARTH VADER: To join the dark side.

SIMON COWELL: That was the worst road crossing I have ever seen!

RANDY JACKSON: Yo dog! He did what he had to do. That was hot!

THE PRINCIPAL: After reviewing a significant amount of data, including the number of eggs laid per minute, the chicken decided that the other side of the road was a much better environment.

THE TEACHER: We are not telling jokes in class!

WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE: To cross or not to cross. That is the question.

SANTA CLAUS: For cookies and milk.

JIMMY NEUTRON: According to my calculations, the chicken required nutritional substances located on the opposite side of the road.

BRITTNEY SPEARS: Oops, he did it again.

THE BIBLE: And God came down from the heavens and He said unto the chicken, “Thou shalt cross the road.” And the chicken crossed the road and there was much rejoicing.

PARIS HILTON: Huh?

JERRY SEINFELD: Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn’t anyone ever think to ask, “What is this chicken doing walking around all over the place, anyway? What is wrong with that chicken?"

ABRAHAM LINCOLN: Four score and seven years ago I saw that chicken cross the road to get to the other side.

A CHEERLEADER: To get the pom-poms, of course. G-O-C-H-I-C-K-E-N! Go chicken!

A PESSIMIST: Who cares?

DR. SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad?

MARTIN LUTHER KING JR.: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.

ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER: It doesn't really matter. The chicken said, "I'll be back."

BILL GATES: I have just released the new Chicken Visa, which will not only cross roads, but will also lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook.

GRANDPA: In my day, we didn’t ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken had crossed the road, and that was good enough for us. And that chicken would have had to walk barefoot five miles in the snow just to get to that road!

JOHNNY BRAVO: Did somebody say there are chicks across the road?

Do you have any other favorite responses?

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3 comments:

Lorena said...

These are adorable.

Nancy Wilson said...

Thanks for the smile! :) I think my favorite was grandpa!
Thanks, Nancy
The Apple Basket Teacher

teachermum said...

You have just made me laugh hysterically on a day when it was very much needed!
Can't stop giggling. WIll be printing these out to share with my kids.